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User blog:GabrielolXP/Waluigi vs Joseph Mulhattan. Epic Rap Gabriel of History
Apparently I'm out of ideas after the first battle, and this might not be as good(?) as the first one. Also I got the , ahem, most obscure character (who doesn't even have his own Wikipedia page) that has ever appear in any fanmade battles! Take that Teddy! I somehow managed to made this in three months with shitload of homework so that's impressive :P. This episode, we have the (literally) infamous hoaxer in the 1870s and 1880s, relevant before-but-obscure-now figure, Joseph Mulhattan (I suggest you do some research first :P), rapping against tricky, overrated and underrated at the same time video game character from the Mario franchise, Waluigi, to see who is a more obscure yet infamous mischief figure. Yes that's a shitty idea. Beat: Swavey (by Tristan) Cast Nice Peter as Joseph Mulhattan Zach Sherwin as Waluigi Battle (Note: Waluigi is in violet, Joseph Mulhattan is in orange.) EPIC RAP GABRIEL OF HISTORY! VS! BEGIN! ' Lyrics = 'Joseph Mulhattan: (0:09) First of all, I cannot lie about this: I’m the best hoaxer, call me death, ‘cause you ain’t dancin’! Putting out this filler, my Star shines Klein and bright. Blasting Bullets of Silver, you’ll be screaming in the height. You are bad coward, in deed as well as in name. Your not a playable guy, ‘cause you’re owned in this rap game! Laser Beam throw, slower than a fat turtle. How ‘bout hop on the steamboat and follow my river flow? 'Waluigi: (0:28)' I don’t even need give a shot or send up trial balloons, Nobody cheats better than me, I’m Purple Prized above you! Your flow doesn’t worth me to swim in, not gonna read these papers, You shaped just like my nose: an attention getting Sam Pepper! You gotta run for your life if you can’t run for president, I may not be fast, but my technique make you a lyre in heaven. Rocking my zig-zaggin’ moustache, we’re partners in crime. Mulhattan’s rhymes are Too Bad, now it’s Waluigi Time! 'Joseph Mulhattan: (0:46)' Stretching truth on racks like the lies I’ve been exaggerating. Look! I’ve written a little novel which your are entertaining! Your Arm’s not so Strong, can’t you defend with your overalls? You won’t be saying “yeah yeah yeah” after I Chop off your Crotch! 'Waluigi: (0:56)' No cheater will be mocked by this wise-guy troll. Let’s talk Internet, fandoms exist for a despised Psycho. (Waluigi grabs a golf club.) I got my club on my side, now it’s time for a Hole in One, (Waaa!) Disses so hot, that your butt Orange Blossomed! (Waluigi raises his leg and his club to charge and hit a golf ball.) 'Joseph Mulhattan: (1:05)' Crack-alot! You’re out of joint as you release charge, While I pimping stories, hemp-picking monkeys, swinging these bars. Petrify your self-pity head and that of Washington. Then get you as a trophy, I need no one’s assistance! 'Waluigi: (1:14)' I’m revolutionary, hypnotise you with music keys. Serve you with up my racket, shouldn’t Brawl in my Family! Prince of Liar, Have you’ve ever told a lie before? Convinced yourself, you’re existence is a Lang-uor or a folklore. WHO WON? WHO'S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! EPIC! WAAAAAAAP!!!!! GABRIEL OF HISTORY!!! |-|Rap Meanings = 'Joseph Mulhattan:' First of all, I cannot lie about this: (As a liar, Mulhattan, surprising, starts of to tell the "truth", which will explained in the next line.) I’m the best hoaxer, call me death, ‘cause you ain’t dancing’! (Joseph Mulhattan was a great liar during the late 19th Century. 'Dancing with Death' means to attempt to do something that is very risky. Waluigi was also a good dancer, consider he dances every time after he won a match, either golf or tennis. Mulhattan said battling him would be dangerous and Waluigi will not dance to celebrate.) Putting out this filler, my Star shines Klein and bright. (Waluigi was considered as a filler character as he did not appear in main Mario games. Mulhattan claimed that a Kentucky astronomer, Professor Klein, had sighted the star of Bethlehem in the sky. He noted that the star of Bethlehem appeared about every 300 years, and that astronomers had been looking out for it for some time. Klein was, in reality, a Kentucky hardware salesman. Mulhattan's article angered real astronomers, some of whom (such as the English astronomer Richard Proctor) wrote in to newspapers to dispute his claims. Mulhattan said he was shining bright, or doing good in this battle.) Blasting Bullets of Silver, you’ll be screaming in the height. (In the final cutscene of ''Mario Super Sluggers, a baseball game with many Mario characters in it, Waluigi and Wario hatch yet another scheme to harm the Mario Bros. in Mario Super Sluggers. While Mario is hitting Bob-ombs shot from a pitching machine, Wario and Waluigi sneak up and load a Bullet Bill into it. Just as the Bullet Bill is about to hit Mario, Bowser jumps in front of Mario and whacks the Bullet Bill back to Wario and Waluigi, launching them high into the sky.)'' You are bad coward, in deed as well as in name. (Waluigi's name was a pun of the Japanese of 'bad', or ''Warui, and Luigi, the brother of Mario. Luigi is always a scared, afraid coward character. Waluigi somehow also shown his cowardliness in some cutscenes of spin-off games.)'' Your not a playable guy, ‘cause you’re owned in this rap game! (There was once a rumour where the NDS remake of ''Super Mario 64 included Waluigi as a hidden playable character. Of course a lot of fans were shocked that he could finally be in a SORTA main Mario game. Evidence were also shown that he was in the game. However, all these evidence were either made up or photoshopped. A rap game is basically a rap battle, Mulhattan is saying that Waluigi could not even have a chance to be in the battle.)'' Laser Beam throw, slower than a fat turtle. (Laser Beam is a special ability in the game, ''Mario Superstar Baseball, which Waluigi was a playable captain character. When this ability activates as the certain player throws the ball to home base, it flies at a lot higher speeds than a normal throw. For a skinny, tall, lanky person, his laser beam throw was slower than a large, heavy Bowser. Mulhattan )'' How ‘bout hop on the steamboat and follow my river flow? (Mulhattan moved from Pittsburgh to Kentucky in the late 1870s, and announced his arrival there by inventing a story about the discovery of a giant cave located near the town of Glasgow Junction. The cave had supposedly been explored for a distance of twenty-three miles underground, and three wide rivers flowed through it. Several mummified remains, similar to Egyptian mummies, had been discovered reposing in stone coffins. A local capitalist, J.R. Pucket, had announced his intention of offering steamboat rides on the underground river. Mulhattan made a pun with the flow of river and his rap flow, saying Waluigi should follow his.) 'Waluigi:' I don’t even need give a shot or send up trial balloons, (To 'take a shot' means to go and try something, in this case a rap battle with Joseph Mulhattan. To 'send up trial balloons' means to test public opinion. Waluigi made these puns to reference Mulhattan's hoax involved a gentleman at the sea shore who gave a little girl a bundle of toy balloons. She tied the balloons around her waist, but a sudden gust of wind carried her away. She sailed out over the sand and would have been carried over the water if an old hunter, who happened to be present, hadn't shot the balloons one at a time, allowing her to gently descend to the ground, unhurt. Waluigi means that he did not even want to battle Mulhattan to see who is better.) Nobody cheats better than me, I’m Purple Prized above you! (Waluigi referenced one of his popular quote, "Nobody cheats better than me". As referred in Mulhattan's line about Waluigi's non-existence in ''SM64, Waluigi's rumour started with a poster titled "Purple Prize". To 'prize above' somebody means to be better than that somebody. Waluigi is simply boasting himself to be a more mischief person.)'' Your flow doesn’t worth me to swim in, not gonna read these papers, (Waluigi referred to Mulhattan's last line about river flow. Waluigi also had the ability to swim anytime in ''Mario Power Tennis.)'' You shaped just like my nose: an attention getting Sam Pepper! (That one's obvious: Waluigi's nose had a shape of a pink chilli pepper. Sam Pepper is infamous prank YouTuber, who do his offensive pranks just to get attention from the public. Waluigi is saying Mulhattan was nothing but an attention grabber like Pepper.) You gotta run for your life if you can’t run for president, (In 1884 the Drummers National Convention nominated Mulhattan for President of the United States. In an interview, Mulhattan suggested his campaign would be aided by his fellow salesmen who could crisscross the country, making speeches on his behalf. Unsurprisingly, he lost. Waluigi suggest him to run for his life, or leave this battle, like he failed to become the president.) I may not be fast, but my technique make you a lyre in heaven. (Waluigi was also the slower character in the Mario spin-off series. However, he is mostly a 'technique' character, in this case he will (use his raps) to kill, or defeat Mulhattan hardly, making him end up in heaven. Also, a a few words from a epitaph for Mulhattan by a magazine, "He plays the lyre in heaven". Not to mention, 'lyre' and 'liar' pronounce the same way.) Rocking my zig-zaggin’ moustache, we’re partners in crime. (Waluigi's moustache was also a reason his fans like him, which shaped like a tick. His moustache were shown to have special abilities to shake themselves or turn upside-down when Waluigi was unhappy, so he said he and his moustache are 'partners in crime', friends getting into trouble together.) Mulhattan’s rhymes are Too Bad, now it’s Waluigi Time! (Waluigi's most famous quote was perhaps "Too bad, it's Waluigi Time!" In here, he said Mulhattan should not have battled, as it will always be his time to shine.) 'Joseph Mulhattan:' Stretching truth on racks like the lies I’ve been exaggerating. (Waluigi was said to be stretched on a rack, a torture device, by Wario, in order to make him taller. To 'stretch the truth' mean to say something that is not completely honest in order to make someone or something seem better than it really is. Mulhattan was comparing the reason of Waluigi's height to his lying skills.) Look! I’ve written a little novel which your are entertaining! (A reference to Mulhattan's quote "Nobody is hurt by my little novels; nobody's morals are corrupted, and all are entertained and sometimes instructed", which he used to boast that his lies were read by millions and millions of people. In many of these "novels", or lies, he stated in the battle that Waluigi was entertaining, which was not true according to the "truth".) Your Arm’s not so Strong, can’t you defend with your overalls? (Waluigi was indeed a skinny guy, so Mulhattan said his arm is not strong. This could be a reference to Lance Armstrong, who cheated the sport he participated in, cycling, thus Mulhattan compare Waluigi to him, for not being a better cheater than Lance. Waluigi's notable outfit was his overalls and in some spin-off games he was a 'defensive' type character.) You won’t be saying “yeah yeah yeah” after I Chop off your Crotch! (Waluigi appeared in ''Mario Striker Charged Football as a playable team captain. Every time a character have scored a goal, a short animation will be played. One of Waluigi's animation was him chopping with his hands against his legs, chanting "Waluigi! Yeah YEAH YEAH!", kinda looks like this. Mulhattan also referenced the name of the celebration made up by fans - Crotch Chop.)'' 'Waluigi:' No cheater will be mocked by this wise-guy troll. (Waluigi often refers himself as a cheater, implying he was proud of being one.) Let’s talk Internet, fandoms exist for a despised Psycho. (Waluigi has a relatively huge fandom (also an anti-fandom) in the Internet, due to his colour scheme, personality, lanky body, moustache etc. He even have his own game made by a fan, titled ''Psycho Waluigi, which was referenced in the line. This is something Mulhattan could not have nowadays.)'' I got my club on my side, now it’s time for a Hole in One, (Waluigi, apart being in Mario Tennis series, he is also playable in Mario Golf. 'Club' has double meaning here, a club could be an object for hitting a golf ball in a game of golf, a club could also mean a fandom or an association or organization dedicated to a particular interest or activity. Waluigi said not only he has a golf club on his hand, so does his fans. 'Hole in One 's when a ball hit from a tee shot finishes in the cup, making a golf reference.) (Waaa!) Disses so hot, that your butt Orange Blossomed! ("Waaa!" is indeed a famous catchphrase of Waluigi to exclaim something. Joseph Mulhattan's pseudonym was Orange Blossom. 'To be blossomed' has an alternate means to vigorously and continually penetrate one's anus (urban dictionary ftw). Waluigi said his raps will burn, or being dissed so hardly, that Mulhattan's anus will started to catch on fire, and hurts himself (hawt).) 'Joseph Mulhattan:' Crack-alot! You’re out of joint as you release charge, (As Waluigi charges and hit a random golf ball, Mulhattan said Waluigi's leg must be cracked, as in a couple of Mario Golf games, Waluigi's also raises his leg in order to obtain a good shot. Being out of joint means to be cracked, Mulhattan was saying Waluigi's comeback was not effective, instead injuring himself. Camelot was the game company which created Waluigi (not Nintendo), Mulhattan made a crack sound and a pun with Waluigi's birth.) While I pimping stories, hemp-picking monkeys, swinging these bars. (Joseph Mulhattan once made up a story about monkeys that could pick up hemp, and these monkeys were said to be trained by a farmer. Monkey bars is a piece of playground equipment which allows kids to swing on, Mulhattan made a pun with monkey bars and bars in a rap battle, saying he is good at rapping.) Petrify your self-pity head and that of Washington. (Even if Waluigi had a overconfident personality, he was considered as a self-pity guy by his own voice actor, Charles Martinet, as Waluigi was hated by almost everyone, including the protagonists and antagonists in the Mario universe. George Washington was the first US President. His dead body rumoured to be displayed and petrified, or turning it into stone. The word 'petrify' could also means to make someone so frightened that they are unable to move or think. Mulhattan was threatening Waluigi to turn him into stone, paving the way to the next line.) Then get you as a trophy, I need no one’s assistance! (Waluigi was a trophy in ''Super Smash Bros. Melee and an Assist Trophy in Super Smash Bros Brawl. In the story mode of Super Smash Bros Brawl, the characters were turned to stone trophies or statues. Mulhattan was saying that he will turn Waluigi into stone and own him in this battle.)'' 'Waluigi:' I’m revolutionary, hypnotise you with music keys. (Mentioned once again, Waluigi was the main villain in the less well known spin-off game, ''Dance Dance Revolution: Mario Mix, this time saying it was 'revolutionary'. His goal was to collect all music keys in order to "flood the world with chaos". According to him in the game, he will also hypnotise the world with his dances by keeping the music keys. Waluigi was saying he would do this same to Mulhattan and show him true chaos.)'' Serve you with up my racket, shouldn’t Brawl in my Family! (Waluigi's role in ''Super Smash Bros Brawl and its counterpart for Wii U was an Assist Trophy, who wasa random character to assist the player who used the item. In his case, he uses a tennis racket, as his debut was in Mario Tennis N64. In the game, he will chase the foe and hits the player with his racket until an amount of time. Not to mention, assist trophies were invincible. Waluigi compared his attitude as if people messing with his family (even if he doesn't have one lol). Brawl in the Family is a fanmade series created (by TriforceBun and fiftyeighthens) with characters in SSBB and mainly focus on Kirby. However, Waluigi, a running gag from the series, became popular with its style of drawing. Waluigi is stating that Mulhattan shouldn't mess with him, ironically Waluigi (in the comic series) hated the Brawl in the Family.)'' Prince of Liar, Have you’ve ever told a lie before? (Joseph Mulhattan was nicknamed the Prince of Liar. Mulhattan also had an addiction of alcohol, which he claims himself having a serious mental problem as he fell from a street car in New Orleans. Later a few months he was arrested for stealing money from a man he had met in a saloon. He later on "confessed" that "I cannot remember the first lie I ever told. Since the recent injury to my head by falling from a street car in New Orleans my memory has been seriously affected". Waluigi is saying that Mulhattan did not deserve the title of being a Prince, as himself was not even sure he ever told a lie. Nevertheless, Mulhattan saying of not "remember the first lie he ever told" could be is biggest lie...) ' Convinced yourself, you’re existence is a Lang-uor or a folklore.' (Joseph Mulhattan's hoaxes surprisingly tricked a lot of people to believe, or at least acknowledge it, this shown that Mulhattan was able to easily convince anyone. Waluigi said his hoax could have convince himself that he was not an important figure throughout history with large impact on it. He also made a pun with David Lang, a (fake) farmer created by Mulhattan and was said to be missing, and the word 'languor', which means weakness or weariness of body or mind, comparing Mulhattan to Lang saying there is no such person, as nowadays people do not know who Mulhattan is.) Gallery Waluigi vs Joseph Mulhattan thumbnail.jpg|Thumbnail Waluigi Golf.png|Waluigi hits a golf ball Poll Who Won? Waluigi Joseph Mulhtattan Category:Blog posts